| It is easy to become addicted. Habits provide | | | | |
| a sense of certainty, security and stability | | | | Anger can also block out logical thought |
| in our lives. When we depend too much upon a | | | | processes, making us feel we are absolutely |
| habit for our sense of well being, it is easy | | | | right. Some individuals who have trouble |
| for it to develop into an addiction. | | | | making decisions can make them easily then. |
| | | | hese kinds of decisions rarely provide |
| Addiction to anger is one of the most common | | | | positive outcomes. Many actions that might |
| and lethal addictions, and one most seldom | | | | seem unacceptable when calm seem perfectly |
| recognized. The anger addict becomes hooked | | | | fine when we are angry. |
| by the false sense of power anger brings. As | | | | |
| the addiction grows, it consumes more and | | | | Anger also encourages us to blurt out |
| more of their lives, producing painful | | | | negative thoughts and feelings we may have |
| consequences. | | | | been holding in that might have better gone |
| | | | left unsaid. Of course, after the surge of |
| The best way to undo an addiction is to look | | | | anger passes, it is difficult to take these |
| it squarely in the face, see what triggers | | | | words back. Even if we apologize the after |
| it, how it functions, the false promises it | | | | effects remain. Although it might have felt |
| offers and the huge costs we pay. The next | | | | good to speak out while angry, a little later |
| step is to undo the lack of awareness and | | | | on when reality dawns, there is often a sense |
| false thoughts the keeps the addiction alive. | | | | of regret. In one way or another we have to |
| As we begin to take charge, we regain power | | | | pay for what we have done. |
| back over our lives. | | | | |
| | | | Below are some exercises which help undo the |
| To begin to dissolve the addiction to anger, | | | | addiction to anger and regain control over |
| we must learn more about it. What function | | | | our behavior and thoughts. |
| does it serve in our lives? What effect does | | | | |
| it have? | | | | Dissolving The Addiction To Anger: |
| | | | |
| Functions of Addictions | | | | 1)List the times in which you feel angry or |
| | | | upset automatically. What person, thoughts, |
| When we are in the grip of an addiction many | | | | memory or situation brings this up? For now, |
| troubling aspects of life are blocked out. | | | | just notice this and write it down. As you go |
| The addiction numbs us and blocks out painful | | | | through the day, if another situation strikes |
| feelings and experiences that we may not wish | | | | you, step back, notice it, and write it down |
| to deal with. It prevents us from seeing and | | | | as well. Rather than reacting blindly, you |
| dealing with issues, which need to be | | | | are now taking time to become aware. Once you |
| attended to. At this point the addiction | | | | become fully aware of the way anger operates |
| serves as a defense against anxiety or | | | | in your life it will not be able to sneak up |
| hopelessness. | | | | from behind. |
| | | | |
| Effects Of Addiction To Anger | | | | 2)Find a substitute for the automatic |
| | | | reaction. Instead of reacting the same old |
| When we are angry we often have a temporary | | | | way the next time the situation arises, stop, |
| feeling of strength, energy,righteousness, | | | | breathe and tell yourself, "I will not be a |
| power, authority or control. Much like | | | | slave to anger anymore." Stop and listen to |
| alcohol, the surge of anger, which takes | | | | the person and say to yourself, "This time I |
| over, can block out fears, inhibitions and | | | | will let them be right. There's plenty of |
| doubts. There is a temporary sense of freedom | | | | time to be right later." Pause and listen to |
| and empowerment that we normally lack. | | | | what they say. See how much better you feel |
| | | | getting pulled down into anger again. |
| The sense of false power which we feel can be | | | | |
| a defense against feeling helpless or | | | | 3)Find a new way of viewing the situation. |
| inadequate. Of course this power is not real | | | | Instead of seeing the one who angers you as |
| power. Once the anger passes individuals feel | | | | an enemy, tell yourself that their anger is a |
| weaker and more empty than before. All the | | | | cry for help. It comes out of pain and |
| while an addiction is running, it makes the | | | | conflict within. Instead of going on the |
| individual feel safe and secure. The reality, | | | | attack, say to the person (either in your |
| however, is those addictions destroy an | | | | mind or out loud), "What can I do to serve |
| individual's true safety. It blinds them from | | | | you?" Not only will this diffuse the anger, |
| doing what needs to be done to build a life | | | | but will open new doors for both of you to |
| of true value and stability. | | | | walk through. |