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How To Delete Songs From Your Apple iPod Nano

The date today is January 2, 2007. Happyat it try to figure out how to delete
New Year. What was your New Year'ssongs from the Apple iPod Nano. The iPod
Resolution? Did you resolve to put anhas no delete function.
end to the war in Iraq as more AmericanIf you search the internet for the way
warships steam towards the Persian Gulf?to do this you will come upon forums in
Did you resolve to put an end to globalwhich people are acting as though they
warming as the Arctic melts into the seahave been cast into eternal Hellfire
and the mother polar bears are unable tocalling out to anyone "Help!" People are
feed their cubs?hysterical and have come up with
There are some things you can controlnumerous conspiracy theories such as
and there are other things which you"Apple deliberately didn't put a delete
cannot control. You cannot controlbutton on the iPod so that when you
whether our sun will burn out today. Youreach 2 Gigabytes you have to buy a new
cannot control the fact that one day youone." The other forum members are
will die. Despite that we spend greatoffering up so much bad advice that they
amounts of time worrying that we or oursound like the arm chair generals on
relatives are going to die. If it is aCable Pundit Television, driving
fact that we are going to die then whyeveryone right over the edge. How many
do we spend so much time worrying thattimes is Vice President Cheney going to
we or the polar bears are going to die?raise the terror alert to false alarm
Wouldn't it be better to stop worryingcode orange to prepare America to invade
that everyone is going to die and justIran?
go on and forget it and enjoy our livesToday it was discovered that people
and our Apple iPod Nanos? Of course itsuffering from shell shock, or post
would but unfortunately our minds aretraumatic stress disorder are more prone
programmed to worry constantly. We'reto having heart attacks. Apparently the
talking about polar bears eating eachfear triggered the adrenaline and the
other because we melted their habitat.adrenaline never shuts off and the
The guilt is unbearable.person's heart is damaged or something.
The President of the United States hasVicious nuclear armed Muslims are coming
publicly declared a Christian Crusadeto get you. Global warming will soon
against 1 billion Muslims, calling themcause the sea level to rise 50 feet so
Islamofascists. Adolf Hitler was athat your city is permanently under
fascist. He declared war upon the Jews,water. Mosquitoes are giving people West
homosexuals, retarded people, blacks andNile virus. Birds will give us a
all non white blue eyed blonde people.pandemic. Cows have mad cow disease. The
Hitler planned to annihilate every Jewdeficit is throwing the country into
in Europe and the Muslim world. Mohammadbankruptcy. The iPod anxiety is the
Amin al-Husseini, the Mufti of Jerusalemproverbial straw that broke the camel's
was Hitler's ally. The Mufti was one ofback. It is the last straw which will
the architects of the concentrationcause us to fight, flee or become frozen
camps, and he helped recruit Muslims forstiff. Not to worry, here is the
the SS. Mohammad al-Husseini was thesolution for deleting songs from your
Muslim leader of World Jihad who was theApple iPod Nano. It's very simple.
mentor of Yasser Arafat, Osama bin-LadenOpen up your iTunes program on your
and every other Muslim terrorist today.computer. Click on your library music.
Hitler and the Mufti were united byStart with the first song at the top. If
their desire to delete the Jewish peopleyou want a song on your iPod then you
from the planet earth. Today the Muslimneed to give it a five star rating. Only
fundamentalists are united in theirthe 5 star rated songs will come into
desire to delete every non Muslim fromyour iPod and all others will be
earth because their Koran commands themdeleted. Now click on the first song to
to do this (Koran Sura 9:5, 29-30; Surahighlight it. You can double click it to
56) for great eternal rewards.see if you like it. Now on the top left
How do evil people always seem to grabclick on file. Then click on my rating.
political and military power? HermanSlide over and give it 5 stars if you
Goering was a German politician andwant it on and 1 star if you don't.
military leader, commander of theNow connect the iPod to your computer.
Luftwaffe and Hitler's second inThe iPod menu comes up automatically.
command. He was captured in Austria andThe first tab to come up is Summary. Put
sentenced to hang at the Nuremberga checkmark on "open iTunes when this
trials. The night before the hanging heiPod is connected." Click "apply" in the
committed suicide by ingesting a cyanidebottom right. Now on the top click
capsule. He asked to be killed with"Music". Put a checkmark on "Synch
dignity by a firing squad like a soldierMusic". Put a checkmark on "selected
but his request was denied. Rather thanplaylists." Put a checkmark on "My top
face the humiliation of hanging he tookrated." Click on "apply" in the bottom
a cyanide capsule. Since then numerousright hand corner. Let the process
people have said that they gave him theupdate your iPod until it says that it
pill, just like John Mark Karr pretendedis safe to disconnect the iPod from the
to have killed Jon Benet Ramsey.computer. To disconnect the cable from
Mass manipulation of peaceful peoplethe iPod press the two little buttons on
into warmongers is a science. Hermannthe side of the thingy. Now go post
Goering said, "Naturally the commonthese instructions into one of the
people don't want war; neither inforums and be a hero.
Russia, nor in England, nor in America,As far as the Apocalypse and global
nor in Germany. That is understood. Butwarming and politics and holy war are
after all, it is the leaders of theconcerned forget about it, throw your
country who determine policy, and it istelevision out the window, eat well, get
always a simple matter to drag thelots of rest and get plenty of exercise
people along, whether it is a democracy,wearing your iPod with only your
or a fascist dictatorship, or afavorite songs. There is nothing that
parliament, or a communist dictatorship.you can do about the other stuff so
Voice or no voice, the people can alwaysdon't waste your life worrying about it.
be brought to the bidding of theWars have been going on forever and they
leaders. That is easy. All you have toalways will. It's our killer instinct
do is to tell them they are beingwhich we needed to survive this long in
attacked, and denounce the pacifists forthe jungle and the law of the jungle is
lack of patriotism and exposing the"Kill or be killed." Who can delete our
country to danger. It works the same inkiller instinct? Who would want to? It's
any country." How do you manipulatefor self defense from venomous snakes in
hawks into doves? If you figure that outthe jungle and hunting for food.
then you are the Messiah. While you are



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